Ruska is the Queen of effin' Everything!

HELLO HUMANS!!!

We have not been here in a while, because we were busy being on adventuuuures!!
Yes, yes, indeed!

We went on a vacation!
You better believe it!
On an actual, real vacation!
Mommy and Daddy went on a vacation to. To the Finland, where we used to live, you know. In the meantime, to not be home alone all the time, we went to a place called the catcave.
It is probably the best place on earth! The catcave is the place where Mommy's friend lives. The one who always came to feed us when we stayed at home during Mommy's and Daddy's vacation.
But she does not live there alone, no no!
She has cats, too.
Three boy cats. They are totally cool and awesome and not as boring and Ruska.
Also, I think they are my BFFs now. I think. I'm not sure. I hope.
I mean, they are my BFFs for sure! At least Joker is!

Ruska did not like the place all too much at first, so I pretended I didn't like it either.
Of course I loved it all the time, but I have to stay loyal with Ruska, you know?

But also Ruska started enjoying it. There is a lot of food and company. Not only cats, also a fishy, a living one, which is not food (Maurice told me he dropped into the fishtank once and it wasn't funny!) and also a weird longish thing. Like a very flat cat with very short legs... and with an armour instead of fur. Ruska looked into some books and came to the conclusion that it is actually a dragon with a beard. That is nonsense, dragons only exist in fairytales!

Oh well, that is how Ruska rolls. She has been telling a lot of stories during the past months. I believed all of them. I believed the one where she met Elvis Presley, cause it sounded plausible. Also the one where she flew her own little double-decker airplane (she told me it is red). And the one of how she fought a dinosaur and died, which is how she lost one of her nine lives.

Mommy then told me that all of that is made up, so Ruska could feel important.
I am in kind of a pickle there.
I think Mommy knows very much. Humans usually know more than cats. But Ruska is my very best sister-friend, why would she lie to me?
Mommy also said according to Ruska's stories cats must have some hundred lives, cause Ruska actually dies heroically in quite a lot of her stories.

But then again, Ruska, acoording to herself, is the queen of effin' everything, so I guess that is okay.

Here is Ruska I, Queen of effin' Everything
...she even has a crown.

Anyways, I was even a bit sad when Mommy and Daddy came to pick us up. For a second there, I thought we could stay at the catcave forever.
Ruska actually breathed into her paperbag and got a stress rash for the first 4 days there, cause she thought Mommy and Daddy do not love us anymore. But Ruska tends to be overly dramatic.

I think Mommy and Daddy enjoyed that we were at catcave. Especially cause I am so full of impressions and adventure that I completely forgot to pee on the floor lately.
Also, Joker told me that Luke sometimes pees on the floor and that he thinks that is totally stupid. Of course I needed to say that I find it totally stupid as well. What would he have thought of me?

Buuuut luckily Mommy and Daddy brought a lot of goodies, so it is not so bad being back home. I think Finland has better treats than Germany.

Look at them:

I like the funny-looking cats on the bags. And the treats are delicious! There are fishies and pillowsies.

Mommy and Daddy also brought new fur for the bed from Finland. But there was too little cat fur on it, so Ruska took care of that:

Actually, I think the fur thing might have been an excuse she used, so she would not have to admit that she missed Mommy and wanted to cuddle with her. With Ruska you never know.

Good night, humans!!

-Pheebs

HELP! THIRST! The water is GONE!

Hello humans....

You need to help me! I think I am going to die.
Mommy and Daddy took all our water bowls away. They want us to dry out!
It all started yesterday, when they brought tons of cat food home and I already thought we were in paradise!

Look how much food they brought!

The odd thing is the box in the back. There is a weird machine in there. Daddy put the weird machine on the floor in the living room. There is water in there and it is moving all the time.
Daddy also took our other two water bowls away from us. I am confused. If we don't drink, we will die.

Mommy and Daddy keep running after us and placing us in front of the weird thing and point at it and sound all excited and squirt water in our faces. They tell us we should drink from it. ARE THEY CRAZY? I mean, we might fall in and die. I don't trust the machine. I really don't. Mommy even gave us dry food for breakfast. We almost never get dry food as Mommy says it is not that good for cats. But she gave us a lot of it this morning and giggled and told Daddy that now we would drink for sure. I promised myself I wasn't gonna fall for it... the problem is, I really like dry food. So I ate some of it and then some more and then still a little more. And I got thirstier and thirstier, I am super thirsty now, BUT OUR WATER BOWLS ARE GONE! Mommy and Daddy want us to die. I am sure of it. They want us to dry right out.

But the craziest thing ever is - earlier I caught Phoebe - DRINKING FROM THE WEIRD THING! She says the water tastes very fresh, because there is a filter in the thing. That can't be right, water is supposed to have cat hair in it. Lots. Also some litter. And maybe a toy or two! Phoebe also says it is much more fun to drink, because it is moving. And she does not have to bend down to drink, as the thing is much higher than our water bowls. That is insane! Everyone here is totally insane.
Mommy is insane! She always giggles when Phoebe drinks from the weird thing. Phoebe drinks a lot more than before, because she says the new thing is so much fun to drink. THAT IS WHY MOMMY GIGGLES! Because Phoebe is going to DIE FROM IT! Soon. SOOOON!

I have to go. I need to find a source of water. Urgently. I am SO thirsty and no water anywhere near! Huah!

-Ruska

THING! I don't trust you, you THING!

We will get a new sibling!

Hoomans! Hoomans!

Great news! I will finally get a new friend to play with.
Yes, yes, it is true! Mommy and Daddy have been talking about it a lot lately. They want to adopt a new pet. Not a cat, no. Not a dog either. Way better - a coconut crab! Even better - a coconut crab baby. An egg to be precise.
We will put it in my cuddly bed and I can sit on it and hatch it and then it will call me Mommy! Because it will think I am its Mommy!
Also we can run around the flat with it and then it can open food cans with its claws so Mommy and Daddy won't have to do that anymore. It is going to be GREAT!

I thought about calling him Teddy.
I think Teddy is a great name for a coconut crab.

Ruska says it is not true. She said what Mommy and Daddy say is something called sarcasm. She said she watched Mommy look at pictures of coconut crabs and she was so disgusted she didn't want to touch her phone's screen to scroll down. Ruska says Mommy is afraid of crabs. Even of the very little ones. And coconut crabs can grow bigger than cats! But I don't believe her.... you know Ruska's stories. She also says she used to be a coconut crab herself in a previous life. So why would I believe her?

Look, here is a picture of how Teddy will look like when he is all grown up!
That's a coconut under him. That's how big he will be!

Byyyyeee!
-Phoebe

Phoebe and the seasonal peeing!

*hits machine with paw*
This... doesn't... wo- oh, see now it works!
I am afraid we need to move our blog soon, because this page refuses to work properly.

Oh...

Hello hoomans!

Yes, indeed, it is me: Ruska! Of course you all remember me, you're my biggest fans after all and Phoebe is just my boring sidekick, right? Nah, I was just kidding of course. Or was I? He... hehe... he.

Anymeow... Phoebe can't write anything at the moment because she is in mourning.
Of course once again she caused her sorrow herself.
You see, Phoebe started the peeing again some weeks ago. Not quite as frequently as before, but still. Nobody really knows why she does that... still. Mommy said that most humans think cats pee places (other than the litter box) when they are sick or sad. Like sad about the home they live in or something. Already last year Mommy and Daddy took Phoebe to the nice lady to have her and her pee checked, but all was fine. So I assumed she must be sad and sat her down for a cat-to-cat talk. After all, you might not know it, I was a cat psychologist once.
Phoebe said she wasn't sad at all. In fact, she insists she is very happy. She likes her food, even though I eat most of it, she likes Mommy and Daddy and her toys and her cuddlybed. The only thing, she said, that could be better is that Mommy and Daddy should get 20 more cats and 5 dogs for her to play with. I hereby announce that I strongly, I repeat: STRONGLY, disagree with that.
Anymeow... Phoebe said that during the last months she just didn't feel like peeing anymore. Now she does again. Severe case of seasonal peeing, I diagnose. ... OF COURSE THAT'S A THING! I got a proof right here! Phoebe!

The seasonal peeing has gotten Phoebe into her current misery.
Phoebe's favourite place is on the kitchen windowsill. Especially in the evenings when the sun shines there. Mommy has put some comfy blankets there, so Phoebe doesn't need to sleep on the cold stone sill. Occasionally, Phoebe throws the blanket down. Accidentally. As happened last night. So earlier she was sneaking around it and whining for Mommy to lift it back up on the sill. Mommy did - and started to curse and threw the blankets on the laundry pile. It appears Phoebe had peed over them. Now Phoebe is very very sad because she has no comfy blankets in the kitchen anymore. This happened before quite many times with cuddlybed and toys and other things. Phoebe just never learns.

Phoebe has been rather weird lately anyways. She suddenly became quite the cuddle cat. I am sure she just does it to toady up to Mommy and Daddy and have them love her more than me. I am still the cuter and more authentic cuddle cat, though.
But it seems to work on Mommy to some extend. She is always exceptionally delighted when Phoebe comes to cuddle her.

Now I need to go and check if Mommy has filled up the food bowls. I'm staaaarving.

Take care, fans!

-Ruska

Here is Phoebe cuddling Mommy...

 ...BUT I'M MUCH CUTER! SEE?

Happy Mother's Day!

Hello humans,

lately we have been rather busy watching the sport with the ice.
You know, I have mentioned it before. The stuff is called ice hockey and we are big fans.

Ruska actually keeps telling how she used to be a big ice hockey star herself.
She had four tiny little ice skates and on one of the front skates there was the ice hockey stick and then she was playing and winning all the games, cause the other players were all humans and Ruska could skate through their legs and nobody saw or could stop her.
I am not entirely sure if I should believe her. She tends to tell those kinda stories.

Anyways, today is Mother's Day!
That is special.
I don't really remember my real cat mother.
And I have never been a Mommy myself.
Ruska is a Mommy, but I doubt she can remember her babies very much, She does not like to admit it, but every time I ask her to tell me about them she has some excuse.

But luckily we both have our human Mommy!
We made this picture for her (and for all other cat Mommys out there. Note: The poem is NOT written by us!!!)

Bye humans!

-Phoebe

Hyvää Vappua!

Happy Meow Day Eve, hoomans!

Meow Day and Meow Day Eve are a big thing in Finland.
Hoomans get drunk.
Cats play and sleep and eat.
Yes, I know, we do that always, but it's way more festive on Meow Day Eve.

Anyways... as we are not in Finland, Mommy and Daddy don't get drunk.
They neither wear their fancy hats and clothes, that they usually wear on Meow Day Eve.

It is sad, because I think it will be much less fun than usually. Even though Ruska said we already spent last May Day Eve in Germany. Apparently, according to her, I have only experienced one May Day Eve in Finland, so less than here. I am not sure if that is true. I can't remember. So many exciiiiting things happened in between, who could be bothered to think about the past?

Also, tomorrow fun times are starting again!!!
There is again the show with the hooman men from different countries competing against each others. But not the same way as last summer where they ran over grass with a ball. They slide over ice with something that is not a ball. And they beat each other a lot. It looks like when Ruska and me are playing.It comes every year and I am a big fan.
This year for the first time I have a real jersey of the Finnish team!
Mommy says it is her jersey, but I don't think so.
It is probably actually mine.
I am going to wear it the whole next month.


I will keep you up to date!

Greetings from Ruska by the way.
She is stuck on Instagram.

Here is a picture of me from my first and only Meow Day (Vappu) in Finland!
I am wearing Mommy's fancy Meow Day hat!

Ruska of Shame and Instagram!!

Hoomans!

What happened?
I was very convinced we would write in here every day. Or every second. Or maybe once a week. Okay, once every two weeks.
Anyways, it has again been over a month!

But to our excuse - things happened!

You might remember Ruska's last post about the riots in Frankfurt.
Well, it turned out, obviously, those weren't about her.
It had something to do with the big building close to our home that takes the sun away from the window. I can understand the riots, it really sucks to lie in the shadow.

Then shortly after the riots Mommy and Daddy left us again and their friend came to take care of us. It appears Mommy and Daddy went to a place called Ireland. I don't know if that exists. Maybe they went to Finland and made this "Ireland" up, so we would not get jealous. Who knows?

But on a more important notice, also the reason why Ruska will probably never write anything in here ever again - we got ourselves a fancy Instagram account! Mommy is not all too happy about it, because Ruska spends day and night on Instagram looking at other cats and posting photos and placing hashtags all over the place. Mommy can't even use her own Instagram anymore, because Ruska refuses to log out for even a second. It's madness! I admit, I also post something sometimes.
But it is not that much fun, because Ruska -again- gets more likes than me all the time.
What is it with hoomans loving calico cats? I am even cuter. Why does nobody notice?
I guess I really should get that fur dyeing done. I was thinking about maybe pink with green dots. That might be special enough to get attention.
I told Mommy about it. She disapproves.
Really don't understand why, she is dyeing her fur as well, why can't I?
Mommy also cut her fur.
After she wakes up she always looks a bit like a Maine Coon cat with that fur standing to all sides from her head. It's amusing.

Anyways, if you have Instagram you should follow us and like all our pictures!
Our Instagram name is - who would have guessed - terrorteam.ruby

Here is a Instagram photo of me!
#cutestcatintheworld